2003

 
2004 

May 2005

June 2005

Dear Lindsay Lohan,

Hello. My name is Dutchess of Wales and no, I'm not really a fan of yours. While yes, I enjoyed the remake of Parent Trap years ago (even though I still prefer the original), I do not think I have ever seen another movie with you in it, and therefore, I cannot claim whether or not you have talent.

Talent or no talent aside, I am here to write you a letter to beg you to recant your recent statement to Teen People magazine that the interview with you in latest issue of Vanity Fair, of which you are on the cover (see right), is a pack of lies.

In the interview you admit to your battle with bulemia. You told interviewer Evgenia Peretz that when you were especially skinny, Tina Fey and Lorne Michaels "sat me down, literally before I was going to do [Saturday Night Live], and they said, 'You need to take care of yourself. We care about you too much, and we've seen too many people do this, and you're talented,' and I just started bawling. I knew I had a problem and I couldn't admit it.… I saw that S.N.L. after I did it. My arms were disgusting. I had no arms." You admitted that you were making yourself sick. And when Peretz specifically asked youwhether making yourrself sick meant throwing up, the answer was yes.

I was so happy to hear that you were finally telling the truth. After all the interviews where you denied your eating disorder's existence, after all the times you went back and forth, from one interview to the next, stating that you were "simply eating less," but then claiming that you never watched what you ate. That you did work out and then that you hated working out and never did it. After all the confusing, conflicting answers you gave when someone asked you about your sudden and quick weight loss... I was so glad to see that you were finally letting go of the control your eating disorder was having over you. Sooo glad that you could finally stand up and serve as a role model to many girls out there who has problems just as you do, showing them that these types of diseases are fightable and can be conquered. That bulemia or anorexia will not control you forever.

But then you had to go and recant it all. You had to email Teen People and say, "The words that I gave to the writer for Vanity Fair were misused and misconstrued, and I'm appalled with the way it was done."

And you had to accuse the Vanity Fair reporter of "lies and changing of my words." Then you had to get your publicist, Leslie Sloane Zelnik, as well, to tell Teen People that you never battled bulimia.

You had to go ahead, once again, and tell the young girls of our country that looking the way you look is ok. No, not just ok, but desirable!

Maybe you aren't lying. Maybe Vanity Fair made it all up. Maybe reporter Evgenia Peretz, a well respected and one of Vanity Fair's "most reliable reporters" according to the magazine, made it all up and risked her reputation and career just to make you look bad. Maybe Lorne Michaels really didn't sit you down and tell you that you needed to stop (Although, I haven't heard him come out and dispute the statement). Maybe Vanity Fair's claim that they have the entire interview on tape is a big ol' lie.

Maybe, maybe, maybe... But I doubt it.

Dear, dear Lindsay. I hope to God you get help and don't waste away into nothingness like so many other girls have done. I also hope to God that you will one day be able to stand up and help other young girls get through bulemia.

Take care,

Dutchess of Wales